Tuesday, July 3, 2012


So after the pride parade the idea of "titles" got to me. Especially because at the end of the night people were trying to define and put a name on what me & someone have going on at the moment. And it got to me its 2012 and we still have the title issue? 

Let's start with the whole gay issue. Love is color blind. It can not see black white caramel or any other race color. So why should love see red orange yellow green blue and purple. Gay marriage has been becoming legalized throughout the years. We live in a different time period now where a lot has been changing and we have evolved from so much now. Slavery is over, females can vote, our president is black so why can't we accept gay pride ? Why are we labeling gay pride? Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transexual? What does that mean? Black, White, Spanish? It is just a label used to describe someone not define someone. 
Frank Ocean (ironic he is bisexual) said "I believe that marriage isn't between man and woman but between love and love" Love sees no colors and no limits so why label it or title it. No need to change or alter titles or names because one doesn't feel comfortable or no what or how to use it. It is just a name. Whatever that person is to you let that person be to you and call it just that.

No, I do not think people are born that way, you chose what you like and you know what well who you like. Bisexual is the funniest one because at the end of the day its experimental. Some people may not know which they like more or what they feel comfortable with more. I do not believe you can be fully bisexual. At the end of the day you end up with one person so you will have to chose eventually lol. However, I still do not believe in titling them either. I say I am attracted to girls and I am asked am I bisexual. No i said I am attracted to girls, I know I will end up with a male and I prefer and choose males does not stop my attraction. I have friends that are lesbian, bisexual, gay, some newly some for a while nothing changes with them and I have yet to title or label them. They are with who they are with while they are with them and thats that.
Now titles for relationships inn gennnerralll. As soon as two people starting dating which is the proper term to use because when you first spark interest and are going through the getting to know each other phase it is called DATING. You are getting to know each other and going out on the social scene, date nights, family functions, the whole nine yards. It does not mean they are in a relationship, they are working towards it if that is what both parties are comfortable with and agree on. What is the rush for a title? What is the 'official' title really going to do and who is it really benefiting? You from stopping to trying to sabotage? I highly doubt since it will probably add more fuel to the fire.  If the two parties involved which is ALL that it is of concern with have an OPEN HONEST agreement be it whatever it is that is all that is needed. They can openly state no sexing anyone else seeing anyone else or talking to anyone else without saying hey would you be my boyfriend and put we in a relationship with each other on social networks? Because that does nothing but set the precedent for failure. If you slowly but surely ease unto the transition there should be no difference once you put the title on it. If putting a title on it is of so much importance and stuff changes then clearly you needed not to have the title in the first place because you don't understand what it is or what it means to you except a title. 
My only issue with titles is I have commitment and trust issues and I feel like I am being owned or one's property. I am very free-spirited and roam wild with feet in the sand kind of female so the idea of titles means entrapment. However, I am a fan of relationships. What people fail to understand is that every interaction and person you have in your life is a relationship. Even the guy who was a quick fling that is a relationship. It is just the nature and extent of the relationship that makes it what it is to you, the other, and others. I am fine with whatever the relationship is as long as it is upfront and direct from jump and the whole way through, no surprises, no lies. Which sadly I have realized is hard to find sometimes smh. Now if I know there is only one person I want or am with and it becomes vice versa then putting an official title on it just so we have a full understanding of what we are and the seriousness of it, I am fine with. But it should not change how one started. People get in relationships and thats it, no friends, no going out anymore, no doing yourself up.. isn't this what brought the two together? Nothing should change except the content of your relationship and agreed monogamy and mature respect and love for another as a partnership. 
In conclusion.. do as you please.. with who you please.. honestly and respectfully.. lovingly. 

The biggest gift in the world is to Love & Be Loved. 



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