Thursday, January 26, 2012

Sex on the first date?

Sexual Intercourse is defined as : the act in which a male's penis' entering a females vagina for the purposes of sexual pleasure or reproduction 
Sexual intercourse can play a powerful role in human bonding, often being used solely for pleasure and leading to stronger emotional bonds

However Sex on the First Night is sometimes frowned upon.. especially more so on the female side of perspectives.. 
With the way our generation is now.. and how commonly and casually sex has become accepted and practiced (especially to the use of media and music smh).. it lead me to wonder if Sex on the First Night was still deemed inappropriate or what other people seem to think about this.   

My own personal beliefs and preferences is to each its own. You know what you want to do with your body and when and how. It is YOUR body. I am not one to judge. Some people make rules "No sex on the first date, No kissing on the first date, 3 date rule, 3 month rule. etc etc" There are even some people who are still holding on to their virginity, or just waiting until marriage. It is everyone's own personal beliefs, and practices that should lead them to decide what they want to do with who and when. 

However, as well as I am not one to judge. If you jump into bed with any and every body on the first date (male and female) then honey let me tell you that is not acceptable at any day or age and you will earn a name for yourself... and not a pretty one either. 

Again that goes for both men AND women. I do not believe in double standards at all. Because men who do the same fast practices as females are prone to the same situations: STDS or Pregnancy. And who is ever going to take you seriously once you actually start developing females for ONE other person the way you move around so damn fast? 

I think it is more on the male than the female, because if you were going out on physical attraction and you both know this is what you wanted and all you wanted then by all means, you had no other intentions. But that does not mean your are exempt from other intentions occurring along the way (unless you keep an open communication to prevent it from happening). However, if you want to get to know a female or even pursue her why are you pursuing her body before her mind? Is this what the core of your relationship is going to rely on? Do you see it lasting? Is that your biggest concern? 

Now, for some (including I) sex is important in a relationship because it is that bond you and the person has. However, if it is bad it will lead to other mishaps (in my opinion), so yes people do like to test the water out early and some base their opinions off of it. My only thing is sex is a taught practice. And if the way it is for a lack of a better term 'going down' is not to par or liking.. teach it to be. Especially since we are all young hello we should be easy to adapt and adjust too! 

Basically my opinion is open communication and honesty. Say what you want, what it is, what to expect and be HONEST. Don't just say something because the other may want to hear it, or be scared to say hey I do not want to do this I want to get to know you better. If they dip then they clearly weren't what you expected. If they respect it , simply ask what was the rush? If you are comfortable or not discuss it. Talking does not cost or inflict any pain.

Anyywayss this is all my opinions but I did take it to twitter
Look to see what others (mainly males) stated about their opinions: 

@tommystacks101 – Thomas graham
I think it depends on what the intentions were going into the night.There are sometimes you meet someone and you know yall [smashing] 
 Would you continue pursuing the girl if you did?
If you start liking them after you meet them it's probably better and the attraction is still there maybe more
If we had good convo caught a lil bit of feelings and it just happened yea. If she was mostly bout us [smashing] then nah 

Aint no big thang we all adults
 Would you still pursue her or would you judge her? Do you believe in double standards?
It take two to tango. He wanted & she wanted. Me personally, I try to not use double standards. So can't hold it against her when wanted sex on first night too. I wouldn't judge her. If I like someone I like them. It would stupid for me to throw away possible love b/c we had sex which we would end up doing eventually anyway. My friend in America normally goes by same ideals as me. But my friend in london play doubles standards hard. They would judge her to fullest & not talk to her after really. But they african so they kind chauvinistic (lol !) 
Aint nothing wrong with it 
Would you still pursue a girl if she did?
I would take a girl serious if she did. Not gonna dismiss her totally cause she is quick to the bed, plus who is to say that she does it on every first date. Maybe I just got her open.(Interesting!) I would question if that is a every first date occurrence for her of course. Whenever you jump into something like that hats tee issues arise on both sides. But it's bout being grown and communication.
Its optional. But if she gives it up that quick she prob [isn't] wifey material. It was too easy if i got it on the first night.....makes me think how easy was it for everyone else. 
You were the one who went for it though, so what if you lost out because now YOUR judged for going for it so quick? 
Then I missed out and I gotta live with it....(whips out lotion) <-----Double standard ideal I was talking about, and he was the only one too.

Go with the flow…what happens happens…relationship will come after it or it won’t 

Nothing is wrong with sex on the 1st date the problem is that there are men and women who make women feel bad for doing it. Because like men, women like sex as if they wanna have sex on the 1st night then they shouldn't be judge for it. However, if this happens I recommend that they make sure they do it with a man who doesn't use the word whore loosely. I agree nay(see below) both parties have to be honest not only to each other but with themselves about what truly want. <------- THIS!!

I think it depends more on the intentions of each person from the beginning but in that case, men (and women) don't care to inquire about all that

To each its ow.If that's what you get into, so be it.
Are you saying that is something you would not do? 
I wouldnt do it personally. but if my friend did, there would be no judgement. you do what you want with your body. so...

@royalspeaks – Justin Royal
Sounds find to me if both parties is with it...cut out the bull.
Would you pursue a girl if she did so? What about double standards? 
It night don't mean you easy...depends on what you think. Obviously...i tend to believe men and women are equal...the double standards is out there but that's how I look at it...I treat you like you want to be treated

Its Life and we are adults now sis!! But if you do it every different nigga then you know what that means

Who do you agree or disagree with and why? Or what is your personally opinion? I want to know! 



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